Parenting can be stressful, especially when you have a child with challenging or concerning behaviors. Parents may realize their kids need help, but so do they. They may turn to something called Conscious or Mindful Parenting only to feel overwhelmed by another parenting goal that does not feel attainable.
I assure you that there is no perfect way to parent, and putting pressure on yourself to be mindful or conscious in every situation is unrealistic.
I have a friend who literally gave herself a headache from being “nicer” to her kids. Her children did not appreciate their new and improved mommy. Instead, they walked all over her. According to her, it was a day and a half from hell.
This friend of mine, Nikki, was attempting what she thought was Mindful Parenting. Like Nikki, many parents equate it with acting friendly, happy, or sweet.
No wonder Nikki imploded… and then she exploded! She let loose everything she had held back for 24-hours, with a vengeance.
Nikki called me in tears and said, “I tried, but guess I don’t have what it takes to be a mindful parent.” She felt like a failure, and she thought that going back to being a drill sergeant dolling out threats and bribes was her only hope.
What my friend endured was not Mindful Parenting. It was more of a crash diet that restricted authenticity and backfired in her face leaving her and her family bouncing around like a yo-yo.
The intention is simply to be aware of your own state of mind and then your child’s. It is the practice of bringing your attention to what’s happening and choosing to respond instead of mindlessly reacting.
Here are a few myths about Mindful Parenting and their truths:
Myth #1: You must act happy even when you’re not feeling that way.
Truth: It is about being aware of and expressing your authentic feelings respectfully.
Myth #2: You must always appear cool, calm, and collected.
Truth: It is about modeling self-regulation and saying, “I will calm myself down, then I will help you,” as needed.
Myth #3: You must know the right thing to say or do in every situation.
Truth: It is about forgiving yourself when you screw up and reflecting on what you may try differently next time.
Nikki’s story and the misconceptions parents have about Mindful Parenting is why I developed Mindful-Ish™ Parenting. Mindful Parenting myths make us live in a state of “should.” Mindful-Ish™ Parenting is a gentler way of dealing with the reality of “what is.” It is also about experiencing more joy, ease, forgiveness, and healing.
Mindful-Ish™ Parenting facilitates awareness of how you interact with your kids, your energy when you parent them, and choosing new possibilities together! The techniques and strategies develop a parent’s calmness, capabilities, and confidence, sparking new levels of connection, communication, and problem-solving. The best part is that the Pareto Principle or 80/20 Rule applies to Mindful-Ish™ Parenting. In Mindful-Ish™ Parenting, 20% of the effort yields 80% of the results. You can get significant results from just that little bit of awareness – the 20%.
Mindful-Ish™ Parenting Monthly Call Group
Mindful-Ish™ Parenting is for all parents and a must for parents with challenging children. I have a monthly group call series featuring Mindful-Ish™ Parenting Techniques and Strategies starting this month! It also includes access to a WhatsApp Support Channel that I monitor! Click here for more details and access to the registration link.
I empower parents and teachers to feel calm, capable, and confident so that they can problem-solve and create new possibilities with their children.
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Which chakras do you need to balance to be a more mindful parent?